Catholic singles and dating
I was shocked and a little disillusioned that she had resorted to a dating website and had not met a Catholic spouse sooner.
Surely she’d had Catholic men queueing up to take her out?
As Valentine’s Day approaches the majority of us may not be inspired by Pope Benedict XVI’s father’s business-like approach to romance.
But the modern equivalent – Catholic dating websites – are producing happily-ever-afters for Catholics. What are the odds of meeting a devout Catholic at a friend’s birthday drinks in central London?
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Sometimes it’s slim pickings, said several local singles who gathered recently at Theology on Tap (To T), a spiritually based lecture series at Ireland’s Four Fields on Connecticut Avenue in Northwest.“Jennifer,” a well-dressed federal employee in her 40s, said she has sought a Catholic husband for more than 15 years but finds it hard to deal with how many men expect sex early on in the dating relationship.“Premarital sex and living together seem to be the natural and quick progression of a relationship,” she said, “and as a Catholic Christian woman, that is not my expectation or practice.”Among her heartbreaks was a potential husband who committed suicide.“The church needs to realize that not everyone finds their soul mate under 30,” she said, “and that it would really help us in our search if we felt more support from the church.”According to the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate (CARA) at Georgetown University, the numbers should be in her favor. But the Washington area - which, with Boston, has the country’s largest percentage of singles - has a ratio of nine men for every 10 women, according to the 2000 census.
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Thomas Morrow, a local priest, has tried to come to the rescue with a book, “Christian Courtship in an Oversexed World.”He endorses Ave Maria Singles.com, a Web site that helps Catholics find spouses. Catherine Laboure in Wheaton, is sponsoring a speed-dating event on Jan. In his book, Father Morrow writes that women should let bad apples go regardless of a desire to be married, saying, “Perhaps you’ll plant a seed that will help him reform and become a good husband for someone else.”He encourages women to respect themselves and insist “on the proper treatment every woman deserves.”Stacy, a Catholic in her 30s from Arlington, has dated in the Catholic community for years and says pornography addictions render men unable to relate to real women.“The men are emotionally and psychologically stunted - adult in body but a hormone-driven 13-year-old in reality,” she said.
But one man at the To T event said there are plenty of choices.“I want to let people know there are many normal, fun, faith-filled people out there,” said Rick Their, 42, an entrepreneur and a parishioner at St.